New Year and New Hope

With the new year arriving very shortly I would like just to reflect on some things I have learned in 2008.:

1. Growth is scary and exciting all at the same time.
2. God is manifesting Himself in places I would have never expected.
3. Stability is rare and appreciated
4. God is manifesting Himself through people I would have never expected
5. I am very grateful for my wife Meghan and my son Jacob. We have been through a lot as a young family, but I would not trade it for the world.
6. Politics can be divisive, and this reflects in the church as well.
7. Poverty, "consistent ethic of life", and stewardship of God's earth are "moral" issues.

This list is not exhaustive, but they do highlight areas in growth and knowledge within my life in 2008, with that in mind, here are my goals for the upcoming year.

1. To be a better husband and father.
2. To reduce, reuse, and recycle more.
3. To allow Love to become my orthopraxy.
4. To direct more of my tithing to fight poverty
5. To be a better co-worker
6. To find myself in God's church
7. To be become more physically aware. (I need to loose some weight!)

Again, this is not exhaustive! I am positive there is more in which I can better myself. I just might have to pull the grace card out. The reality is I have to rely on the power of God for me to become the person I truly need to be. However these are some practical areas I wish to work on in my life.

-DJ

http://audaciousliturgy.blogspot.com/

Coffee Beans and the Cincinnati Reds

Great smells can affect my mood. And bad smells can direct moods as well, just ask Meghan after I eat Taco Bell. I am a big fan of coffee! I absolutely love the the scent of coffee. I really don’t know why, but there is something about the coffee bean that can light up my senses. As long as I can remember I have always enjoyed smelling coffee. As a matter of fact I can remember in high school when I had an experience with a coffee bean that I will never forget.

For some reason, I was at a Kroger grocery store doing what every 17 year old would be doing at grocery store. I remember strolling down the isles, one by one. A particular scent brought me to the coffee, tea isle. Kroger had these machines where you can grind your own beans, which was all too fascinating to me. As I was exploring the flap at the bottom, I realized that I wanted to have one of the coffee beans. I did not know if I could just have one. And if I could have just one, I did not know if I had to pay for it. I was a little worried about the idea of taking one coffee bean just for my smelling pleasure. I did not know if it would be considered stealing or something. However, this inner controversy didn’t last long as I caught a whiff of that coffee bean.

I am greedy; at least I can be at times. As good as that coffee bean smelled at a distance, I could not help but wonder how it would smell real close up. As anyone would do, armed with that kind of wonder, I brought that bean as close to my left nostril as I could. I gave it a sincere sniff. Then it happened. Yes I know, I should have seen this coming. But as you already probably guessed the coffee bean found itself firmly in my nose. As a matter of fact after gold digging for 15 minutes, I realized I could not pick this thing out. It was way up there!

After realizing I was running out of options, I decided to give my nose a good blow. With elephant like force, the bean freed itself and flew out some where out in the Kroger isle. (Yes I was still at Kroger during the whole episode.) Feeling a little embarrassed, I quickly made my escape through the isle and out the door. I am just glad that I didn’t have to go to the emergency room.

Bad smells are exciting too! I will never forget a trip that my college buddies and I took my senior year. We took an SUV packed with 6 or 7 men, (If you could call us men) but either way it was packed. It was going to be at least a four hour journey from Parkersburg WV to Cincinnati Ohio to see the Reds play. That was the good news too. The bad news, I was stuck in a SUV with the most notorious gas releasers I have ever known. There we were, only 15 minutes down the highway, and the thunder started rolling. With no exaggeration the windows were fogging up with so much methane in the air. The driver decided to lock the windows, so fresh air was not an option. This was funny at times, and downright ugly at other times. Still this day, when I recall that drive, I can’t help but still smell that not so good scent.

I always think that out of all the senses, the nose is the forgotten one! The power of scent cannot be ignored. Every time there is a something in the oven that resembles decent food, are noses are the first to tell us. Every time someone created more road kill on the highway, our nose is the first to tell us.

I don’t think it is a stretch that God can smell too. We are created in His image. With that I mind, I wonder what scent that I have. At my best effort, I wonder if it is a pleasant smell. At my worst, I wonder how much of a stench I create. I also wonder when God looks at our churches, what God smells. Does it smell like roses when churches share with God and His mission at the food pantries and soup kitchens? Does God think that churches stink when the rest of the world knows what we are against rather then what we stand for?

I guess this is another way to challenge myself. If by thinking what I do creates a distinct smell, then I want to make changes. I do not know if I will always smell good to God. I do know that Jesus might smell pretty good. Maybe that’s another point. Left up to me, I can’t clean myself enough to get this stench off of me. Jesus is kind of a deodorizer. I have every possibility to smell good with Jesus. Because of Jesus, He allows my scent to light up God’s sense. It may be even possible that God smells fresh coffee beans when He takes a whiff of me, because of Jesus. It is my desire to reflect on the scent that I produce with the understanding that Jesus brings my scent to a brew for God.

I find great hope with in Paul's words to the Corinth church,

"But thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumphal procession in Christ and through us spreads everywhere the fragrance of the knowledge of him. For we are to God the aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing. To the one we are the smell of death; to the other, the fragrance of life. And who is equal to such a task? Unlike so
many, we do not peddle the word of God for profit. On the contrary, in Christ we speak before God with sincerity, like men sent from God." (NIV)

-dj

http://audaciousliturgy.blogspot.com/

Feeling Christmas-ey

This is the first time in a long time that I am feeling somewhat Christmas-ey. I grew up in a religious tradition, where Christmas, as far as a religious holiday on a calender, was never emphasized. After growing up in the glory days of Christmas, where the experience seemed magical, I have had to relearn Christmas as a grown man. I think it has helped me greatly that I have the ability to allow my son Jacob to experience that same magic. My wife and I got up at 6:15 am on black Friday to experience the craziness and the chaos of what comes with this shopping day. (I still am not a big fan on how Christmas is largely becoming more and more materialistic.) We found several sales on gifts for those that we love, including Jacob. I also have purchased my first Christmas album called Christmas Songs, by Jars of Clay. And believe it or not, I actually enjoy the songs atmosphere and mood.



I guess I am trying to relearn Christmas and the magic that I experienced growing up. And I believe there is something magical in a holiday that should center on loving and giving. And even though my tradition always taught me to not see Christmas as a religious holiday, I can't help to think that we might be wrong, or we are being mislead. There is something religious about everyday. There is gifts to appreciate from Jesus in the mundane. This does does not suddenly stop on December 25th. Even beyond that logic, I cant help but get excited about the fact there is a lot of Jesus going around. He is in the airwaves, on the front lawns, and even on Hallmark cards.

I wish for my goal this year and going forward to relearn Christmas and the celebration of audacious love and giving. I want to be apart of the magic with my family. And in doing so, I don't want to leave my friend Jesus out of the picture. If God allows the mundane to become sacred, I trust that he will also allow national holidays to do that as well.

Merry Christmas, and have a happy New Year!

-dj

http://audaciousliturgy.blogspot.com/

Blessing and Questions

One of my favorite people in the world asked me a great question about a week ago on the phone. Mel Mendoza asked me a question that I cannot simply get out of my head. Mel asked me what does it mean to be blessed. I have heard sermons all of my life. I have read bumper stickers that say "God Bless America". To make this more personal, my wife and I ask daily that God "bless" us. I want to look at a question when I consider what it means for God to bless us. Then I want to ask will be on my perception of being "blessed" by God.

When I ask God to bless me or my family, what is it that I expect from God? This is a tough question for me. This question reveals my highest expectation from God and His role in my life. My wife and I pray daily. This is not to brag, or even to say that we have never missed a day. In fact we have missed days more times then I am proud of. However, every night before bed, we try talk to God. And usually the prayer usually goes something like this,

"Dear God, thank you for all the many ways you have blessed us. Thank you for our family and our marriage. Thank you for the jobs you have blessed us with, and please help us do our jobs the best we can. Please bless us over the night and keep jacob safe. Help us to wake up refreshed and rejuvenated. Allow us to reflect your presence to all those around us. Help us to love at all costs. Thank you for you Son, who has shown us the way. Please forgive us in the many ways that we do not live up to His example. We pray all this in your Son's name, Amen."
This prayer is just an example and it is not the same every time. However, we usually hit these points among others when we pray. As Mel Mendoza asked me the question on what it exactly means to be blessed, I couldn't help but see how my prayer life reflects what I think it means to be blessed.

Here are some "blessings" that my prayer life reflects:

Blessing number 1: God giving us a lot of stuff. I should be thankful for the blessing of God giving us our apartment, food, and everything else in between.

Blessing number 2: God giving me people that I love in my life and God keeping my loved ones safe.

Blessing number 3: God providing a place to work and to make money.

This seems pretty real to me. I mean, before I talked to Mel and thought about his question, I would have never thought twice about rattling off these three different areas that God has blessed me. However, thinking about the question on what it exactly means to be blessed by God, this answer leads to a problem.

What if I was a Christ follower and I was as faithful as I could be? What if I had none of these "blessings" that I listed above? Does this mean I am not a blessed person? Would I not be doing something right? Worse yet, if I was not blessed, does that mean I would be cursed? I am struggling with those questions. When looking at these problems in consideration of my prayer, I think the reading of the Beatitudes is interesting.

"Now when he saw the crowds, he went up on a mountainside and sat down. His disciples came to him, and he began to teach them saying: 'Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled. Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy. Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God. Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God. Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. 'Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you. " (NIV)

Jesus himself is trying to answer the question in which Mel posed. I don't think I like the answer though. It bothers me. Something can't be right. To be qualified to have blessing you have to be poor in spirit, sad, meek, hungry, and thirsting for not getting what we deserve. This is crazy stuff. I have to be honest, I don't know what to think of this. All I do know is that it does seem like that that the blessings I seek from God are completely opposite from what Jesus teaches us on what it means to blessed. I also find it interesting, (or troubling) that this is not an example of someone asking to be blessed, this is Jesus telling His followers WHO is being blessed. WOW! What do you do with this? I cant be a 100% sure!

I do know this. If blessings are just limited to money, food, clothing, jobs, safety, and a lot of stuff being given to us, then the majority of the world is not being "blessed". As a matter of fact, it seems that America is one of the few places that have been "blessed" by God. But may be that is the problem. Maybe we have seriously limited our defining frame for what it means to be blessed. It seems to me that there is much more to being blessed then the many ways in which I have limited God. I want to relearn what it means to be blessed and realize my limitations I have put on God and how he blesses me.

-dj

http://audaciousliturgy.blogspot.com/

Stone Soup And the Call for Community

My wife just recently purchased several scholastic books for our son Jake. She explained to me that she wants this to become our little tradition, for me to read to Jake every night. Being the good guy that I am, I decided that it is worth a go. One of the books she purchased was Stone Soup, by Jon J. Muth. The crazy thing is I actually remember the book from when I was young. As I put Jake in my lap and read the book to him, I could not help but feel the tug of God's spirit.

Let me give the summary that is on the back of the book:

"Three monks, Hok, Lok, and Siew, journey along a mountain road trying to understand what makes one happy. At once the monks encounter frightened villagers who lock their windows and darken their homes. The villagers have long been ravaged by harsh times, and their hearts have grown hard toward everyone they meet. But when the monks cleverly entice them to make soup from stones, the villagers discover how much they each have to give--and how much more comes back in return."

To put the story into my words, these monks use a unique proposition to move the village into a community built on relationships. The proposition: to make soup from stones. The stones were not the only ingredients after it was all said in done.

It all begin with the cold welcome to the monks from the village. After trying time after time to even interact with anyone at the village, they decide its time for the stone soup. They find a girl and asked her to provide the soup with a certain ingredient. Another person added their ingredient, then another and another. After a while, all were pitching in to help with the making of the soup. After the soup was done they had a celebration. They ate the soup and told stories and sang songs in celebration. The monks had a place to stay and the village was transformed in community.

I must admit, I was just going to read the story to Jake with no expectation that God would be in the mix. I put Jake to bed with the understanding that it seems that humanity is in a dire need of stone soup.

We live in such individualistic ways in the western culture. It can be a cold world, where at first glance it may seem everyone is out for number one. But,

I believe in the audacity of the message of Jesus.

I believe that the kingdom that was at hand is still the kingdom at hand.

I believe in the invitation to join in God's work to bring about His world.

I believe in the Stone Soup of Jesus and and the community that it offers

I believe that we can still be the community that Acts 2 offered for the 1st century followers.

Just as the monks used a crazy proposition to transform the village into a community, I believe that Jesus offers a way of life that will transform this world. May we find ways to participate in this dream of God in bringing about a community based on relationships and love.

-dj

http://audaciousliturgy.blogspot.com/

My Position In Ministry

For those that know me well, they are aware of my ever changing life, especially within the last year. At this time last year, I was going through hell and back, and my immediate future was very much in question. I felt this to be a great time of reflection, because of the difference a year can make.

I will never forget that first day of college. I walked into the gymnasium to pick my classes. I was signed up to be a business Major. I remember looking at the class offering thinking to myself, "you got to be kidding..." macroeconomics, marketing? Ugh, this was not my idea of a good time. I made the decision at that moment to change my major to bible. I wanted to become a youth minister. This what I felt God was leading me to. I was not going to turn back.

Long story short, this isn't exactly what I expected. I had a short stint as a youth minister, met some great friends, but this did not work out to favorably in the end. I am now working a Nationwide Financial, as a Variable life sales and service rep, and I am actually enjoying it. (How ironic the way life takes you sometimes!) I have had thoughts on getting back into "professional" ministry, however I have decided ministry is what I make of it. I used to tell our kids in the youth group that ministry is not meant for a select few, all of us need to be a minister in our context. This is my opportunity to do just that at Nationwide!

I just recently got my series 6 licensing and it appears that this is immediate future. I want to allow God to use me in anyway, in this context. Just a few goals I have set for myself...

1) Love at all costs! As the Rob Bell bumper sticker says "love wins". I want to love with no condition, and I hope those around me can experience the Love in me!

2) Don't be preachy! I am very passionate about many things and my beliefs, people do not to need to hear me on my soap boxes! They need to see light and not and darkness

3) Humility. Jesus came to save me too!

4) Serve at great costs to me. This should be obvious, but not to say it is not difficult.

5) Be involved! I used to feel that I should distance myself from "the world". I am not going to do this, I want to be available and to build relationships at my profession. I also should not hold my self an more "privileged" then those around me, which leads me too my last point...

6) Learn from those around me! I feel that sometimes God will over flow the structures (church buildings and followers) to work outside of those structures. I have lots to learn about God from those around me ( followers or not) and I look forward to what God has in store.

What is my position in ministry? I think it is to join in God's work in my context and to allow God's teachable moments to change me.

-dj

http://audaciousliturgy.blogspot.com/

The Jake Reminding Me to Smile

It was my duty this weekend to watch my son Jake, while the wife went to hang with the ladies! Unfortunately he has been pretty grumpy, and I am not positive why. This picture of him just reminds me to smile and to remember that sometimes smiles do not come easy, but we should always capture them in our memories.

-dj

http://audaciousliturgy.blogspot.com/

Feeling Like a Rock Star

If I was living in a fantasy world I would so be a rock star. I absolutely love music and good musicianship. There is hardly nothing better then when a musician comes up with a piece, that for some unexplained reason, sends chills down your back. And to be a creator of such a piece, to experience that journey would be such a great feeling. If you ask anyone I know, music is very much a passion of mine. The wife and I actually just did an inventory of all the Cd's that I have purchased over the years and I must admit that my collection has become an expensive investment. With my love an passion for music, I could just imagine I would be a rock star only in this fantasy world. I would be performing the music pieces that I have created, and I would be sharing it with the rest of the world. However there is a reason why this can only happen in this fantasy world. There are several problems in the way that separates me from just being a music lover and a Rock star, such as the fact that I can't play an instrument or can't sing, just to name a few. But I want to share an experience in which I had a glimpse of, if only a small one, of what it feels like to be a rock star.

In college I had a room mate that I would consider to be a musical genius. His name is Ryan Brown. He had the ear and the gift to put together a string of chords, and as he put words to this, something special happened. He truly has a gift of musicianship like no other that I have met. Ryan also had the gift of singing, so the total package is impressive! I was inspired by Ryan and his gift. I was so inspired, that I decided to run after my fantasy occupation and I purchase a $400 Ibanez artcore guitar. She was a beauty! I decided that I wanted to learn how to master my new toy so I can chase my Rock star dream. I would watch Ryan and I tried to pick up pointers. On occasion, he would verbally explain things to me, but more times then not, I would just watch. Many times I would even ask questions and Ryan almost found it hard to teach me. I think it was because he was so good at this, he just did it, and he didn't know how to explain it to a peon like me. After some time, I would no longer fell that the best way to learn from his gift was by asking questions, so I continued just to watch. I would get brave enough sometimes and I would pick my guitar up and play in random sequences the four chords that I had learned. I found myself embarrassed to play my chords in front of Ryan. Honestly, I would avoid even picking up my guitar in his presence. I am not for sure why I was embarrassed. But I kind of guessed that it was that he was so good, and I was certainly not. Looking back I can say that after time, my inability to play well enough to not feel embarrassed in front of Ryan, put a damper in my dream of becoming a rock star. And actually I still have the guitar, and I still know those 4 chords, I can truthfully say that I have no progressed much since my collage days. But this does not sum up my rock star dream experiences! I believe there is more to tell...

In college, I took a road trip. Ryan's girlfriend at the time (Cara) wanted to go see her brother at Virginia Beach during spring break. I was and still am really good friends with Cara and I had never been to Virginia beach so I was defiantly up for a road trip. Putting our faith into my '94 dodge spirit to actually make it to Virgina Beach, which it did, we drove to her brother's (Todd) house. This was the first time I had ever met Todd. Cara kept telling me that he was cool and that I would like him. I did like him. He has a 'cool" spirit about him. He is an artist of many trades. He was really fun to be around with that week. He is a musician as well, and he wrote his own songs. I will never forget what happened.

You see, even though I am great friends with Ryan, I was never given the opportunity to play with Ryan, probably due to the fact I absolutely had no confidence in my playing ability. But my experience with Todd had a different tune. He got out he guitar and just started playing. He then gave me another guitar, and told me to strum a chord in a specific pattern, then repeat that pattern to 3 more chords. I remember being nervous. Sure I knew how to play the chords, but I also knew that I had always struggled with any sort of rhythm. I also had never have played with any one else. I begin to do what he told me, before long my rhythm was decent enough that he began to sing a song with my guitar strumming laying the back drop for his vocals. This was AWESOME! I had never felt so alive musically. In that moment I was living to the full. I was so proud of that moment. At that moment I truly felt like a Rock Star! I don't know if what we put together that evening even sounded like what others would describe as music, but it didn't matter. All that mattered is that as a musician, I mastered that moment. I received a glimpse of what it meant to be a rock star.

To this day, I still haven't progressed much in creating music. The closest I get is Guitar Hero. But, at least I still have the ability to remember that moment in which my fantasy world became a reality, even if it was just a moment. I think there is something to this. I mean, even beyond being a rock star, I wonder if there is real life stuff in this. I cannot help but wonder if a lot of us want to be a rock star, and Jesus is the perfect musician. Jesus created and played this good news music better than anyone has ever played. For my whole life, I have appreciated his ability to carry this tune from a far. Much like Ryan, I have watched and admired. There is nothing sweeter then to see how Jesus played that beautiful song and how he still carries that tune. What Jesus accomplished as this Gospel Musician, is simply jaw dropping. Not to mention all the miracles, Jesus loved people. I mean He really loved people! He cared for the poor so beautifully. He was willing to stand up for the unprivileged to the point of death by the empire and the religious elite. This was a gospel the would run through his veins, and that embodied every action of Jesus. I love Jesus and what he accomplished as this "Gospel Musician". I must say though that I have loved Him from a far. I have admired from a distance.

I feel embarrassed, because sometimes I don't feel I am up for the job. I do not want to take the music that Jesus has created and turn it into a sour tune. I want to be able to play this music with Jesus knowing that I can at least keep up. There are those that have played with Jesus that even in their imperfection, they have held up admirably. I have to remind myself of something. The song that Jesus created was never meant to be admired from afar. Much like Todd who invited me to be a rock star, Jesus invites me into a participant in the song He created. Will there be times where I am going to fail to stay in tune? I would have to think that there will be many times. But I can't help but imagine that Jesus is next to me with His guitar and he is instructing me on the chords and rhythms. Most importantly, he is asking me to poUr my efforts into this beautiful and graceful song. May God give me the strength to pick up my instrument and become a rock star and live in the fullnes of Jesus' good news.

-dj

In need of community

Me and the wife were in bed last night just talking. Somehow we got on the subject of what seems to be missing at church. We have both for sometime felt that the church "services" we attend just seems to be void. I think for the first time, we both embraced the idea of what was missing is community. We thought about the fact that our whole theology revolves around what happens on Sunday morning. It just seems from 9:00 am to 10:00 a.m., we have decided that this is priority number one. Churches seem to embrace leadership training behind this Sunday morning theology. We train young men and women how to do public prayer, how to lead singing, how to pass communion, everything that can be trained concerning the worship "service". Are we missing something? Is there more to following Jesus then this one hour a week. I certainly hope there is. I am desperately on a search for the body of Christ outside of Sunday morning. I don't want to invite friends to a church service, I'd much rather invite someone to a community that embraces the embodiment of the Gospel no matter the day or situation. I no longer am satisfied with the "hour" status quoe, I want the life in full. I no longer want to take communion in isolation, I would like to celebrate the life of Jesus through community. I don't want to be trained or to train others on Sunday theology, I want to embrace life with a new theology, the everyday theology. Me and my wife are ready for something new. We are looking for what is next, we are searching for God in an everyday context. We are in a great need of community!
-DJ

The other guy is not "evil"

I realize with the rising tensions in our political environment, especially considering the fact that we are nearing election day, that those that endorse a candidate are certainly passionate about their positions. I think I can understand the passions about supporting a canidate that best represnts a person's idealogy and politics. However, I wonder if it is neccessary to attempt to justify one's endorsement by convincing ourselves that the other canidate is evil. I have found that there are some out there that have given their endorsement to their canidate. Because of their endorsement, it seems they go on a campaign to convince others or maybe even themselves that the other canidate is a horrible human being. My challenge to all my friends is to not give way to this "either/or" philosophy. I understand supporting a party or canidate, but in doing so, lets not convince ourselves that the other party or canidate is evil. Instead, I believe it is okay to fully suport the canidate in which you want to represent your positions while at the same time not reducing the other canidate as an enemy. Those of us that follow Christ, this becomes even more important to realize. We are called to not dehumanize others, but to serve in love and in submission. Let us reflect the way of Jesus in our political dialogue.