Learning the Language of Your Daddy

Fatherhood has been a whirlwind. When I heard I was going to become a father, I was both frightened and excited. I was frightened because up to that point, I really didn't like kids, especially ankle bitters. I was excited because I realized that first, I was indeed able to pro-create, (There is a since of pride in this right?) and second, I was going to be a daddy!


This whole 'fatherhood' thing has been a steep learning curve for me. I had never been around babies, and the thought of changing diapers, and other maintenance work on Jacob gave me great apprehension. I remember I didn't even change one diaper in the first two months of Jacob's life. I remember one of my first experiences in changing Jacob's diaper, I encountered a problem. I placed the new diaper underneath the old diaper Jacob was still wearing. As I dismantled the flaps of the old diaper to engage the transition into the new one, the diaper flew wide open. No big deal right? Well, I guess the cool air hitting bare skin triggered a release of 'old faithful'. (I was impressed by the power behind...well never mind.) Instead of taking the new diaper and doing a quick cover, I stepped back, as to not get hit. My wife Meghan stepped forward and took over from there. Needless to say, I had a lot to learn.


One of the aspects of fatherhood that has been completely rewarding is watching Jacob go from an infant into a walking/talking toddler. It is happening so fast, and I am trying to soak as much of this as I can. Jacob first expressed himself through facial expressions and cooing. Now he is saying words and short sentences. Its amazing for me to think that some of his first words was 'daddy' and 'mommy'. Out of the words that he could have learned, he had chosen to learn these words first; 'daddy' and 'mommy'. I often wonder why he chose these words. Perhaps these words chose him, as he has probably heard these words over and over. I also wonder if these words mean anything to him. I would love to think that it does. In fact my wife just last night taught Jacob to say "Awesome Daddy". My heart was butter at that point.


Jacob still does a lot of "baby talk". It's funny listening to him sometimes. He might say something like this, "ahue jeuif huihhp watch Monstors" (Monster Inc, is his favorite movie right now.) I feel like there are moments where no matter how clear Jacob's language is or is not, Jacob and I are on the same page. I feel like that at moments, I fully understand the language Jacob speaks, even when it does not resemble anything that's English. There is a connection beyond logistical language. There is communication that goes beyond syllable pronunciation. Even when Jacob says "Awesome Daddy", its not exactly clear as day. This sort of dictation doesn't disappoint me though. In reality, experiencing my son's language, as he feels his new world out, is exhilarating. Any expression of affection through words directed to me, even if it is just a coo, melts me away.


Sometimes I wonder how much I don't understand God. Does God get upset with me if I tap my foot in worship? (Or even clap?) In my attempts to learn the nuances of God's language of doing things, do I upset Him when I don't get the pronunciation right? As I stumble to show my affection for God through the way I live, is He waiting for me to screw it up? The God that I knew did, to an extent anyway. I don't know if this was necessarily taught to me by anyone or any church, but He sure didn't care if my motivation was good or not. That is the way I knew Him anyway.

I wonder if I had it all wrong. I wonder if I still do, but what if God looks at me the way I look at Jacob as he stumbles toward affection? Jacob now says "Daddy Awesome" the best he knows how. And from everything I know about Jesus, he referred to the guy upstairs as "Abba, Father".

Father.

Wow... Father!

That's something to marinate in for a while.

-Dan Jones

"The Sacredness of Questioning Everything" Serves As An Invite to Another World

David Dark, author of "The Sacredness of Questioning Everything", extends an invitation, in a string of essays, to join him in a different sort of world. This world has its own language and tone that David Dark artfully introduces line by line. Dark coins a language that consists of distinct descriptive nouns such as "uncle Ben", "nobodaddy", "plain speak", "HERstory" and "sacred cows", just to name a few. There is not so much as an explanation to this language, but an expectation to join in. At first, I found myself asking questions on what this new language was speaking of. (Perhaps this is to be the intention; hence the title?) However, as I progressed through the pages, I found myself caught in the moment much like a movie where you begin in a new world, but by the end you feel like you belong in that world. ("Chronicles of Narnia" and "Lord of the Rings")

This new world and language points and directs to a new culture of exactly what the title implies. Dark argues that there is very much a "sacredness", something to be had, in the culture or art of "questioning everything". Dark certainly lives in this world and this becomes apparent in this book. Using a wide range of sources to exemplify and embody this new culture, Dark himself recognizes that "questioning" reflects how we see ourselves in relation to God and those around us. The book is broken into chapters, each chapter introducing a facet of life that deserves a discipline of questioning. These facets include everything from God, History, the future, and even our offendedness. With such compelling facets, it is only fair that Dark chose to use a pop sensibility to showcase what this may look like through the likes of U2, Arcade Fire to "the Office". It may seem that the use of such vehicles to illustrate a direction or point would be an attempt to "dumb down" something that is difficult to understand. There is no such attempt here. The ability of Dark to provide social commentary to further illustrate his direction is impressive.

These facets are further explored at the conclusion of each chapter through a set of....you guessed it, questions. I find this to be a completely appropriate way to conclude each facet, and also to encourage a dialogue to further explore the direction Dark takes with each chapter.

After reading the book, I found myself eager to begin to live in this world that Dark invites us into. I can see how the "sacredness of questioning" can lead to a proper posture in relation to God and others around us. The question I continue to ask myself is if I have the humility to embrace this culture of uncertainty? Perhaps this is an appropriate response to the reading of the "The Sacredness of Questioning Everything".

-Dan Jones